Are you breaking your contract?

[00:00:00] Well, hello! This is The Daily Five with Aurooba, that's me, where we reflect on creating our best lives a little bit every day. Here we go.

[00:00:15] Y'all, it's the 20th episode right here. We are 20 percent through the season. There's also two weeks left in January 2024. How are you doing with your goals? Good? Bad? So so? I hear you. On all accounts. Which is why today we're going to talk about contracts. How often do you break a contract? The answer isn't never.

[00:00:42] I mean, I've broken contracts before, amended them, shortened them, lengthened them, and yeah, sometimes kind of broken them too. But the question is how often do you break them? I'm willing to bet not that often.

[00:00:55] You show up for work every day, yes? You probably have a contract that stipulates you come to work. With an employer, a client, or customers who expect you to do what you do so they can keep doing what they do. You show up for work even on the days you don't feel great, even on the days you don't want to, even on the days where you'd rather just stay in bed. You show up for work even when wild things are happening in your life, and you show up, paint a smile on, set up a cheery attitude, and you get to it.

[00:01:23] So tell me, why are you consistently breaking contracts with yourself? Are your promises only real when you make them to other people? Are the rewards other people give you for honoring your contracts with them better than the rewards you have offered yourself?

[00:01:41] If you're breaking contracts with yourself, you have a problem. So, take a few minutes, maybe 30, sit down and evaluate the contracts you've set up with yourself. You said you wanted to hit 10, 000 steps every day. What did you miss in that contract that you are now breaking it? What could you make better about that contract?

[00:02:02] My first philosophy class in university, one of the first things we read about was the social contract. The idea that we as individuals have willingly surrendered some of our freedoms in exchange for protections and order by submitting to some kind of government. This social contract is the basis of order in our world right now. And I liked that it was called a contract, because it is.

[00:02:24] What is a contract?

[00:02:27] I've been rewatching the show Suits recently, and there's this episode where they talk about the elements of a legally binding contract. Now, there's a touch more to it than they say, but let's limit our consideration to their definition, because their definition is good. For a contract to be valid, it needs three things. An offer, acceptance, and consideration.

[00:02:49] The offer is what the contract obligates you to do. The acceptance is when the other party agrees to that. And the consideration is that all involved parties get something out of it. For example, I'll build you a website. That's the offer. The other party says yes, and they give you money. So, they're getting something out of it, and you're getting something out of it.

[00:03:12] So, these new resolutions you've been setting up and having various levels of success with, these are contracts. Or they should be. Do they have those three elements of a contract? Because if they don't, it's unlikely they'll hold up.

[00:03:28] Contracts may be a legal thing, but y'all, a lot of legal foundations are built implicitly upon human behavior, and what we know of our own nature. It's a cycle, so our behavior affects it, and it affects our behavior. But the point is, contracts are real even when they're not legal. If you want to achieve something, you have to make sure your contracts have the required elements.

[00:03:49] Otherwise, you'll fail, and you won't hold up your end of the bargain. Even if the other party in the bargain is you. You want to walk 10, 000 steps a day? That's an offer. You accepted it. But what did you get in return? Simply better health is unlikely to be good enough for most of us. You need something real.

[00:04:07] Which admittedly, might sound silly. If your thoughts went to something material, like, Hey, I'll do this for, like, a year, and then I'll let myself buy this, that, or the other, you might feel like that's a little bit like bribing yourself. So, if you don't like that, think outside the material box. Maybe, you know, you're gonna do this for six months, and then you'll be in good shape, and you'll be able to do that hike all your friends want you to do, but you've been afraid to do. The underlying reason may be better health, but you have to find a way to get yourself there.

[00:04:38] So, tell me, how are you doing on those contracts you keep making with them, with yourself? Are they good enough? Do they have all the required elements? If they don't, maybe they should. Thanks for listening. Same time tomorrow?